mindshifting conversation circle
The Conversation That Changes Everything
Starts With a Question.
A free 45-minute guided conversation for teams, groups , and communities.
Everything you need to host it - included.
Asking Instead Telling:
A MindShifting Conversation Circle
You Don't Have to Be an Expert. You Just Have to Be Willing to Start.
A Conversation Circle is a 45-60 minute guided discussion where a small group explores a MindShifting concept together — not through a lecture, not through a workshop curriculum, and not through assigned reading.
Just people talking honestly about how they show up in tough conversations, what they've noticed about themselves, and what they'd like to do differently. The conversation does the work. The host just opens the door.
You don't need a background in conflict resolution. You don't need to have read the book. You don't even need to be good at handling conflict (yet). You just need to care enough to start a conversation — and this kit gives you everything else.
Every kit includes: a host playbook, icebreaker options, a guided conversation arc with discussion questions and timing, a troubleshooting guide for the unexpected, a closing script, and print-ready participant materials.
Think About the Last Time Someone Told You What to Do. Not Asked. Told.
How did that feel? Did you want to do it — or did something in you push back, even if the advice was good? Even if they were right?
Now think about a time someone asked you a good question instead. One that made you stop and think. Did it feel different? There's a reason for that.
When someone tells us what to do, our brain reads it as a threat to our independence. Even if the advice is sound. Even if we asked for it. We get defensive, we dig in, or we shut down. The harder someone pushes, the more we resist. This is true with children, with colleagues, with partners, with friends.
But when someone asks a genuine question, something different happens. Instead of defending, we start thinking. Instead of pushing back, we start talking. And when people talk through a problem out loud, they often arrive at the change that makes sense to them — on their own terms.
This session also explores the important difference between a demand and a request. A demand: 'You need to finish this by Friday.' A request: 'I'd like this done by Friday — do you think that's doable, and if not, what would work?' One shuts the conversation down. The other opens it up.
What Your Group Will Explore
Phase 1 — Recognize It (20 min): The group explores what it feels like to be told vs. asked. Think about someone who tends to tell you what to do. What happens inside you when they do that? Now think about someone who asks good questions instead. What makes that feel different?
Phase 2 — Understand It (15 min): Why does telling feel easier than asking? When someone resists our advice, what do we usually do? Has anyone been asked a question that helped them see something they couldn't see on their own?
Phase 3 — Try It (15 min): Participants work in pairs: one person shares a situation where telling isn't working, and the partner helps rephrase it as a genuine question. Then they switch. One of the most immediately practical exercises in the series — groups often laugh in recognition.
Get the Conflict Style Conversation Circle Packet
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People leave with three practices: Catch the tell. Check your curiosity. Try one rephrase.
Simple to understand. Surprisingly hard to do consistently. Which makes it perfect material for a group conversation.
What's Inside the Kit?
Host Playbook - prep checklist, timing guide, and facilitation tips
3 Icebreaker options - The Lineup, The Person Who Changes You, Wins and Whoopsies
Guided Conversation Arc - three-phase discussion guide with questions and timing
Host's Guide to the Unexpected - facilitation troubleshooting
Closing Script - ready-to-use wrap-up transitioning to participant takeaway
Participant Concept Overview - the five conflict styles in full, with descriptions
Participant Takeaway Sheet - all five styles + Three Things to Notice This Week
Keep Exploring page - books, courses, and free tools (with QR code)
Who Is This For?
Anyone Who Can Gather a Few People and Ask a Question.
Conversation Circles are designed to be accessible to any thoughtful person who wants to create space for real conversation in their community, team, classroom, or living room. You're not the expert — you're the host. The difference matters.
Team leads and managers building psychological safety
HR professionals and OD practitioners
Educators and school counselors
Book club organizers and community group leaders
Coaches, therapists, and facilitators
Parents bringing MindShifting into the home
Anyone who's ever thought: "We need to talk about this, but I don't know how to start"
There's a moment in almost every session of this one where someone says, 'Oh, I do this with my kids.' And then: 'I do this at work too.' And then someone else says, 'I've been doing this my whole life and never knew it had a name.' That recognition — followed by a single different sentence in a pair exercise — is what a Conversation Circle is for. You made it possible.
